The Car Goes Where The Eyes Go

I just finished reading the book ‘The Art of Racing in the Rain’. Some of you may have also read the book or perhaps you have seen the movie that came out in 2019. For those of you that have not read the book nor seen the movie, I can tell you it’s a story that many of us can we relate to. Especially if you’re a man that lost his wife to cancer.

That’s me and I’m not ashamed to say that I cried a few times across the pages of this book. I’m not going to give you a review or synopsis of the story but will tell you that in a number of ways at a number of times it brought me both tears and laughter while I read and it ultimately gave me a sense of gratitude as well.

The saying, ‘The car goes where the eyes go’ is a favorite and life guiding mantra of the man, the husband, the father, in the story. He is a race car driver so you can understand the saying from that perspective. But there is a higher meaning of the saying in that our life will go wherever we place our focus. I’ve found that to be true in my life since my wife’s cancer and the almost three years since her passing.

As in the story, my life has changed greatly since losing her. I have endured grief, pain, loss, and the missing of her. Those first many months were rough for me. But I never lost sight of what had happened. She had finished her race not in defeat but with victory. She had shown me and our kids strength and endurance by not complaining or dwelling on the uncertainty and fear of her situation. She remained strong as best she could right up until her last few days with us. She finished her race and I can imagine with a smile in my heart, her victory lap as she arrived in heaven.

Our life, call it a rat race or a race through the years, is just that. It’s our life. We never know for sure what will lay around the next bend but if we keep our focus on what our life should truly be all about, we’ll be able to stay on the road, the track, and complete our race as well. With victory.

We may get in crashes at times. Delays may occur. Even detours that take us to places we hadn’t planned to drive to. Our race may be a sprint, a 500 miler, or more like a 24 hour endurance grand prix but whatever our race becomes the key is to keep driving to reach the finish line. To let the road we’re on become an extension of who we are and where we’re going. To take every turn with confidence knowing that we can finish in strength and with gratitude for the race we ran.

I encourage you to read this book. The subtitle for it is ‘Meet the dog who will show the world how to be human’. The story is written from the dog’s perspective and is quite entertaining. Enzo and his human Denny shared a love of racing and had worked out a method of communicating where Enzo would bark twice when asked if he really wanted to do something. The Doodle and I have are own method as well. Not barking but a certain look and she’s giving me that now. Yep, it’s time for another walk. So as Enzo would have done, we’ll bark twice. Which meant ‘Let’s go, one more lap’.

Keep your eyes on your road by friends.

See you down the road….

And The Night Comes

What is it about the stillness of the night?

You should be sleeping but in the quiet, your mind is replaying the events of the day, the things you should’ve said and done, or what you need to do tomorrow. There’s not a sound in the space around you but in your mind it’s a non stop race of thoughts.

I spent today catching up with a good friend over lunch, helping another with some car issues, and hanging out with my daughter while watching Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune. There were laughs and hugs. It was a good day and yet tonight I’m lying in bed trying to sleep and just can’t seem to get my mind to relax.

I’m thinking about friends dealing with illness or addiction. Others grieving the passing of loved ones. The struggles some families are going through with their kids. Couples in conflict. Souls feeling rejected and forgotten. The misused, mistreated, and mistaken.

My life has been pretty good lately. Actually very good and I’m thankful for that. But this world we live in is still full of problems and as I see others going through tough times, I’m reminded of the struggles and challenges that have come my way over the years. Some easier to live through than others but all changing me from who I was to who I now am.

Next week I’ll turn 59. Just another number. Another step in the marching of time. My life, just as most everyone I imagine, has been a cycle of ups and downs. Good times and bad. Things expected and some not. But they all have led me to where I am now.

And tonight, as the night comes, in the midst of my sleepless thoughts, I’m asking God to not quiet my mind but to show me, to use me, to somehow help those that I can. To be brave. To be true. To be compassionate. To be a friend.

A common saying among the followers of Christ is ‘to show others the love of God in all that we say and do’. I haven’t been very consistent with that. I’m human and my humanness often overpowers my faithfulness. But I’m working on it and as a work in process, I’m grateful that regardless of the mistakes I’ve made I’m still given opportunities to do what is right and be who I’m called to be.

So tonight until sleep does come, my prayer for myself, for all of us, is that we find hope and peace right where we are. That we are thankful for all that has been and that when the morning comes, we’ll be ready to bring that hope and peace into the lives of those that we hold in our thoughts. In all that we say and do.

See you down the road….